Goodbye 09

Well well well, what a year! Ive learnt a lot of lessons, met some amazing people, experienced lots of new things and developed more as a person. I had an amazing Christmas. usually at Christmas when i see my dads side of the family i kind of sit there awkwardly and don't really enjoy myself even though there are all insanely nice but not this year i had a blast and i had a great new years too, being surrounded by people you love and enjoy being with, a bit of grog and an epic view of the fireworks is all you need. i hope my new years resolution works out, i only had a little midnight kiss last night so that's good i guess =] also I'm scared and excited as to what yet another year will hold....lets just hope i don't fall deep into another hole

Time to save me from myself

"I'm not in love, i just wanna be touched...i just want your kiss boy" -Kate Nash

That's what i used to be like, we all know i don't mind a few kisses at most parties i go and i like to make the most of being single (not that I'm a full on slut or anything but you get me?) but my faithful blog followers, i have a new years resolution. because of recent events Ive decided to rethink the way i can be sometimes, i know I'm a sexual person but i also just want to be loved, who doesn't? i want to find some one again who really cares about me but because i have been having meaningless fun while doing that i started to realise people must take me less seriously and because of that, see me as more a good time instead of girlfriend/lover material. So here is my new years resolution all, no more spin the bottle, kissing people for the fun of it etc I'm saving it all up for someone who cares. I'm not going to seek out someone to like, I'm not going to even consider dating someone unless they prove they really care about me or doing something romantic for me. i know it's cheesy but i just want to find some one who loves me for me again and be serious with someone, for a long time. I'm very excited about the few upcoming days leading up to new years, its jam packed i cant wait. i hope you all had a merry Christmas, did i mention mine was the best Ive ever had? ill explain in a later post. for now i must go....laters!

For Breadon :)

there you are my dear, just for you, i don't feel bad any more :) did yall know breadon is pretty darn rad? oh yea, he loves my blogfish too almost as much as i. did i mention his awesomeness? k thanks bye :)

Take me back to the age of innocence

Firstly, Merry Christmas everyone! i don't think I've been this excited for a Christmas since i found out Santa was not at all real. tonight me and my dear friend Alex have been reminiscing about childhood such as first albums, our favourite songs/singers, how much better 90's kid shows such as lamb chop, Mr squiggles, art attack, the original Pokemon series, Malcolm in the middle and all Aussie adventures where so much better then today's kids show (eg, Dora becoming a tween, what the hell is that?)and also remembering how we had to perfect everything for Santa and what happened when we found out that Santa Claus, dear old saint Nicholas was all a big lie. Do you remember the times of making sure everything was clean? making sure the warm milk and the plate of cookies and the carrots for his reindeer where perfectly set out on your coffee table? making sure your balcony door was unlocked so he could get in (or maybe that is just me since I've lived in units my whole life and never have had a chimney) and how you made the list for him and you tried to wrap your mind around how he could cross the world in just one night? WOW! i don't think ill ever forget the day i found out he wasn't real, friends at school told me and i remember i refused to believe and still wanted to so bad i had a big fight with Alicia and Jess about it. they where like, THEN HOW DOES HIS SLEIGH FLY? i replied...........erm..............um..............CHRISTMAS SPIRIT......yeah ah uh. then i went home and asked mum and she was like, yeah he's not. i was so upset and every year since that year 6 Christmas it wasn't as fun for me, pretending for my little sister and missing not knowing and realising that everything was changing for me but now that she knows too my whole family jokes around and goes ZOMG SANTA! YAY! and tease little Zian about it who just goes...=.= i know hes not real, then we go oh sure he is! don't say that! :D so now for once I'm as excited as i used to be as a little oblivious naive child, maybe also because this year has been insanely good and life changing and a big learning experience. Merry Christmas all, hope you enjoy it as much as me :)

them crooked vultures

People are weird. Today was a day full of mixed emotions, feelings, outbursts and surprisingly good times. to drive to burwood station, it takes 15, 20 minutes at the most but today two buses i was waiting around for public transport, it took two god damn hours witch put me in a bad mood to start of my day and because i was late i felt bad for Rachel as it was her birthday and i had delayed everyone, but it turned out we wern't very late after all so i cheered up a bit once we arrived and found everyone else at the beach, i also think the fact i barely ate all day put me in a bad mood also, but i bought the new Frankie magazine at bondi station so that upped my spirits a bit too. all in all a good day and on the train home, i told Sarah askew and Jana I'm glad we have been hanging out at lot more this summer because we never have previously and there real nice girls whom i now enjoy spending time with. there where just various things that happened today that kinda kept me down throughout the day. such various random weird things people do. like when i was late and running to the station at burwood, two leb guys yelled "RUN EMO RUN" because we all know in burwood if your not lass, or lebb and wear chuck taylors and actually have style, your emo. Also on my way home walking from the station there was a pretty obese man walking towards me,so i stepped to my left to let him pass by like i would any other human being but as i do so, he gave me a strange look then decided to walk into me and go EH!!! and bump me backwards with his mighty belly! it hurt! it was bizarre! i just had this stunned look on my face and an a elder man next to me was like, did you know him, my response NO! then he asked if i was okay then we agreed it was insanely absurd. this is a weird weird world.

My Paper heart

Well it's finally summer holidays and all is well so far, its been non stop since school finished Wednesday. Last night i hosted Axel an epic goodbye party, i was partying from 11.30am till 3am. started off with everyone at the pool nearest my house with the music pumping, random hot guys with epic tattoos joined us ;) and the weather was just prefect, we had soft drinks and food, my big havianna thong lilo, i didn't have to buy any food/grog/drink all day since everyone else supplied it (Y) then at about 4/5 some of those girls left then we all went up to my apartment more people came, all the boys brought the grog, we played tipsy sing star and partied all night, then me and Daniel dnm'd till 3am while our mothers where out haha :) was a good day and has really gotten me looking forward to this summer, a change is in the air....

Boulevard Of Broken Dreams

:S whyhmm yes well where to start. i think ill start at how i will fail hsc Ive been so insanely nervous it but ill hopefully pull through somehow. also i still cant believe what Mr galea said in that meeting yesterday when i said i didn't believe in god, "its very fashionable not believe in god Zara" thanks sir good to know you think i choose my beliefs based on weather it is "fashionable" or not. yeap good to know you think i am really that shallow that's just grand. there are four members of the opposite sex that are annoying me greatly. how am i to good for you? why do you STILL manage to annoy me? why must you be so on and off and why must you still say stuff like that even though its over? men i swear, and people wonder why there's so many lesbians in the world.

despite that stuff life's going pretty alright i suppose, had an epic pool day at mine and have some really good events coming up, I'm so pumped for New Years at mine it will be grand, Casey's party was good also, court's slr camera ensured great results. speaking of slr's i get to borrow a friends one for the holidays, start my art major work i cant wait to use it =]