No getting over you

whenever it's you and me , everything's so dramatic. We have moments that seems like they have been scripted in a movie. you and me are either perfect or on the brink of insanity, one of the two extremes. i can't date you because we fight like crazy and i can't just be friends with you because of in insane amount of affection and feelings i have towards you that never ever seems to shake off. you drive me absolutely crazy, i don't know what it is. I can't seem to get you out of my head. i thought my feelings were gone but there obviously not. I don't know what I want, I don't know what I want. ah what to do what to do, I guess there's no getting over you....

Cassie :)

"oh..Totally"

"She said, hello mister
Pleased to meet ya
I want to hold her,
I want to kiss her,
She smelled the daisy, 
She smelled of daisy's,
She drive me crazy,
Gonna take her for a ride
on a big jet plane 
Gonna hold you,
Gonna be kissing in my arms "

Easier to Run

Eventually, when I save up enough, I'm going to pack up, get out, grab some friends and a camera, travel everywhere in a kombi van, get drunk,get high, have adventures and just leave this world behind.....

Im watching you..

..watch over me, and iv'e got...the greatest view from here <3

Used and abused

You didn't trust enough, i trusted too much. I'm not perfect, we all screw up, we all make mistakes. i not a sinner but I'm not a saint. I've made mistakes, I've done some stupid things, but it doesn't mean i should have to be punished for them forever. how come the person i have loved more then anyone was the hardest to be with and the messiest ending ever? why must i always fall for someone who is either pathetic or the situation is insanely complicated? why does everything have to be so hard? why must we be criticised for every time we make a mistake or a slip up? no matter how big or small that mistake is? what if you don't even do anything wrong yet people still assume and accuse? why must people do that? why can't people also admit that they are not perfect either?why must we all go through so much pain? why must my heat ache so much? why must i keep getting my heart repeatedly broken? why can't things stay good for a while when they actually do get good?  AM I NOT ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY FOR MORE THEN ONE DAY AT A TIME, must something ALWAYS HAVE TO COME UP! this is why i don't believe in god, and if he exists, he must hate me. life isn't fair, life is fucked.

Random rant about everything

since the careers expo at MLC on Friday I've been thinking about my future and what i want to do with myself and my life a lot, maybe more then i should. i thought i would get nothing out of the expo but i did. before i walked into the car park where it was held and picked up flyer's and booklets of everything music, dance and photography related i didn't really think i could do much,  i had almost no options, i now have to many. at the moment I'm considering the following when i leave school:  1. audition for either music theatre or contemporary music course at AIM (Australian institute of music) and find a job to help support me. 2. JMC academy of popular music and performance or 3. CATC design school, enrol in a photography course, work towards photojournalism, have a part time job and work on forming a band in spare time. leaning more towards option 3 at the moment. who knows though. maybe even bartending could be cool as a job, since im a night owl, the hours would be perfect for me :)

i also really hope to do well with my ATAR even though the places i want to go to are all either audition or portfolio based i want to prove to myself that i can do well. the back of my door and walls are becoming covered in notes. i really need to clean my room, any takers? i often dream about my dream house or apartment. anything with a room purely for music with speakers, guitars, records, record player and awesome sound systems, a room full of books, lounge room, kitchen and bedroom filled with funky furniture and Polaroids photos all over the walls sounds good to me.
i hate being sick. loosing my voice and ability to sing is terrible. its so depressing not being able to sing.

one last thing. Nate is the best thing that's ever happened to me. and i love him. and that is the end of my rant for tonight :)